Memories

I have put this off too long. I regret to admit, Monkey was lost on a past trip to New Orleans. Many thanks to all the fans that insisted the page stay up. (My favorite memory is when the representative of the British Monarchy insisted it be temporarily taken down, for me to be able to perform for Queen Elisabeth.) I still don't know why I think the stinky little thing was so damn funny.

Sorry "Bro"

After an exhaustive investigation a grand jury has finally concluded their inquiries into the gratuitous "tasing" of University of Florida student Andrew Meyer. Newly declassified photos revealed that the tasing was not solely perpetrated by campus security, but primarily by an unidentified assailant. The identity of said assailant is not being released due to his status as a minor. Rob Griscti, the lawyer for Andrew "Don't Tase Me, Bro!" Meyer, says there are no plans to file any charges, "Mr. Meyer just wants to put this behind him".

Combover of Conviction

The Be-spectacled Combover Lobby (or BCL) was out in force this week. Reportedly, hazing of its newest member commenced soon after cocktails on April 21 2007, at an undisclosed location inside the beltway (easily recognizable as Denny's on the 23400 block of Q st.). It has been well know that the BCL controls many world events, from the 2003 policy changes of the World Bank to the seemingly random resurgence and subsequent disappearance of the McRib Sandwich. The jury is still out on the simian overtones of this latest BLC acquisition.

Fidel, Monkey, and The Pope

In a world where two Popes face off across the table of world domination, only one can be the true Pontiff. And the man tapped to make the crucial distinction is a lovable old scoundrel (played by Fidel Castro) we never did learn to trust. Can he pull us from the edge with the strength of his will, or will it also take all his heart?

Pro Bono

Monkey has always done pro bono work for many of the new emerging democracies in the Middle East and South America. Here he is telling his client to be quiet, after an outburst where the older gentleman rose and addressed the court as, "You sons of a motherless goat!!".

Monkey and TV's "Hawk"

Having created and run his fan-site since 1995, Monkey poses with TV’s "Hawk" (Actor Thom Christopher) from the 1980’s hit show "Buck Rogers of the 25th Century", at the actor’s fiftieth birthday party in Atlantic City. As keynote speaker, Monkey surprised the crowd, who undoubtedly expected a speech of praise for Thom Christopher’s genius, by inexplicably threatening the life of singer songwriter Neil Diamond then storming off stage.

In Good Company

Known well for his "Old School" preferences, Monkey takes a moment to bask in the "vibe" being "laid down" by saxophonist Roger Carroll with Chez Roué.

Identity

Jackson was arraigned on Tuesday. The identity of the minor in his company has been protected.

Down with "The Man"

Monkey has always seen through the whitewash that "the Man" has often tried to put between his eyes and the truth. And these experiences have guided his heart in a direction that has drawn to him many strange bedfellows. For this he makes no apologies.

Old Friends

After a mid-summer picnic in the English countryside Sting and Monkey pose for a picture beside a tragically beautiful elm, beneath which they first meet in the spring of 1978.